Monday...

Still sporting my sugar high...I was hoping my religious use of my medicine would make a difference....not so far.

Started the pellet stove today, feels warm and cozy. Bob thinks it is fascinating watching the flames. A boy after my own heart!

Hoping things get better on the fringe..
Susan

Gnothi Seauton

Saturday......

Good morning from the frozen fringe, it snowed a little overnight, and my nice neighbor shoveled my driveway. I had done it last night....about 3 inches worth.
Blood sugar 172 this morning, and it's now 283 about an hour after eating. I will be glad when I can get this under control. I feel awful. I am tired of sugar highs and weepy days... and worse I know I don't need to feel this way and then whine about it, but I'm tired of being good. I know indulging myself is not great but once in a while I think I can do this.

Soon I will get into why I am fringe-like, I know I said I would tell but life got in the way...I feel the need to clear my thoughts....
until then...
Susan

Ty Herndon - Journey On (2010 Video & Lyrics)

Ty Herndon - Journey On (2010 Video & Lyrics)


I have always ALWAYS loved Ty Herndon and his music...this video and song are just icing on the cake of my affection for this man. Right now this song is my rope ladder for making my way out of the hole. I can make it.
I am still "sweet" as ever, I will be glad when this portion of my life goes away...289 after shoveling ice and snow...
I am trying not to stress because that drives it higher....deep calming breaths..in..out..in..out

Please watch the video~~~peace
From the icy fringe
Susan

Wednesday you are a good day...

some days are nicer, some are nasty. The sun was shining and even in my hole, I could see and feel it shine. My Doctor's instructions...Stay happy, healthy and keep exercising. She rocks, she was so kind to me..what more could you ask? They took a ton of blood and hopefully my sugars aren't to shocking, I may need to go up on my diabetes medicine. I have a new anti-depressant and we will see if that works...

So hopefully soon, no more sugar highs nor lows to my toes...at least this is my wish and hope. My dull mean head will once again be clear. My eyes may actually stop leaking.
I am not going to set to much store that I will be perfect so that I may actually step off the fringe but there may be hope. I believe that I may never be able to fully step off the fringe but maybe be able to take an afternoon off :)

I am taking steps towards a healthier me.. I was going to say better..but I haven't changed internally.

Live your life and forget your age...Thank you Norman Vincent Peale!
From the hole under the fringe....
Susan

Sunday

I am still suffering the sugar high blues....
I am so tired and cranky. The dogs and cats will be happy when I get my sugars under control, I get really short with them I try not to but having high sugars are not pleasant. I just wonder how much damage, being on the fringe of really high sugars is doing to me... see I really do spend my life on the fringe.
Goodnight .....peace
Susan and the Zoo

Come Saturday morning......

Good morning from the fringe, sugar a little lower at 189..still not great, suffering from a headache, you know one of those annoying dull ones.....

It is springlike here today. I know we are going to pay for this and I hope we are not sorry. I still wouldn't give up this nice weather.

I still have my friends dog she is doing well, my cats...not so much she really just wants to play but they are a little twerped out. Not sure when she will be well enough to take her back.

My adopted soldier's boat was part of the rescue of the Iranians.. I am so proud. Even though they are our enemy we still do the right thing. I am sure this will not make any difference in our relationship with Iran but we did the right thing.

Well off to make breakfast, something high in protein and low in carbs...
Have a great day, from the fringe...peace
Susan

342 Days, 1 Hours 36 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....The Hobbit
180 Days, 22 Hours 36 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....Gettysburg
52 Days, 13 Hours 36 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....13 Again

Crying on the fringe

I have managed to cry at all the jobs I worked at today....no one knew, sometimes I would just spill the tears slowly and then once I was sobbing...silly I know, good thing no one knew. Thankfully I work alone mostly!

I was going to say not sure why but I know why, I am lonely. I am reading/listening to books for pleasure, brain-candy, my sister-in-law says, but it makes me wish for a mate, friend, lover, confidant, sparing partner. "I want the fairytale" (Pretty Woman). Unrealistic I know but I have waited a long time for my prince and shouldn't I get what I want? Probably not....tears are flowing right now as I type this....

Don't think I am in my feel sorry for Susan mode, but I could be, it's very fringe-like for me to love from afar, romance in my head and try to make it seem real...just that lately it isn't enough. It isn't satisfying this time to dream.
Maybe it is my diabetic sugar high I have been riding on for the last few days.... I am not a doctor nor do I play one on TV. :)

Seeing my prime-care person on Tuesday and maybe once I come off my sugar high, I will be back to normal and be able to not wish for the fairytale and go back to being fringe-like, so I don't need to step off and find that one person I have been wishing for.

Well, off to walk the dogs, hope my blood sugar comes down and I am 'normal' again...
From the fringe...peace
Susan

Thursday from the fringe.....

Really feel fringe-like today. Seems like the wind is blowing through my fringe...almost falling off...
Trying to stay balanced but it is hard today.....






343Days, 15 Hours,0 Minutes... The Hobbit
54Days, 5 Hours, 0 Minutes...13 again
182Days, 12 Hours,0 Minutes... Gettysburg

Bad diabetes day

Hello, its been a bad diabetes day, sugar is high and has been most of the day....its 259 right now I got up and did somethings hoping it would go down. nada....
I don't feel too well and not really up to blogging.

345 Days, 14 Hours 14 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....The Hobbit
184 Days, 15 Hours 14 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....Gettysburg
56 Days, 6 Hours 14 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....13 Again

So from the fringe think low blood sugar
Gnight


Bye, bye and buy bonds....online

Winter is upon us.....

Hello day two 2012 you sure were an interesting day... Work and a visit to a friend in the hospital.
Listened to Alone by Lisa Gardner to and from work, then a Nora Roberts book in the afternoon.
Football games on TV so nothing much to do.
The weather reports of lake effect snow, not sure how much we will get but any snow is too much in my opinion. Then the temperatures are going to drop with a high of 16 tomorrow and my lady I work for has a doctors appointment.
My countdown is now going to be here,
346 Days, 18 Hours 22 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....The Hobbit
185 Days, 15 Hours 21 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....Gettysburg
57 Days, 6 Hours 21 Minutes and a bunch of seconds....13 Again

Same breakfast as yesterday, oatmeal, walnuts, and apples, coffee... cake at Deb's lunch was cheese and pretzels and an ice cream sandwich. A bowl of cereal, and chicken and carrots for dinner. YUM

Wren still here and doing okay, a little nervous and noises are hard on her, fun walking with trucks and stuff outside.
I wasn't much on the fringe but standing on the rug....
bye,bye and buy bonds...online

Welcome 2012

Good Morning 2012, I hope you are better than your predecessor. I wish you you dear 2012 a time without war, pain, unhappiness and ill health. I know this can not be but i can dream. I watched 2011 go and you arrive with bells whistles and cheering albeit on television, it was quiet here in Richfield Springs. The dogs and I wandered into your clean crisp night and welcomed you through the stars and clouds and mist, it was lightly raining.
The morning has brought a spring-like feel and the sun is shining. Thank you.

I wait in anticipation for what you are to bare in the coming year. Please be kind to man-kind although we are not always kind to you.
God Bless you.

From the fringe...peace

Bye, bye and buy bonds....online