I have managed to cry at all the jobs I worked at today....no one knew, sometimes I would just spill the tears slowly and then once I was sobbing...silly I know, good thing no one knew. Thankfully I work alone mostly!
I was going to say not sure why but I know why, I am lonely. I am reading/listening to books for pleasure, brain-candy, my sister-in-law says, but it makes me wish for a mate, friend, lover, confidant, sparing partner. "I want the fairytale" (Pretty Woman). Unrealistic I know but I have waited a long time for my prince and shouldn't I get what I want? Probably not....tears are flowing right now as I type this....
Don't think I am in my feel sorry for Susan mode, but I could be, it's very fringe-like for me to love from afar, romance in my head and try to make it seem real...just that lately it isn't enough. It isn't satisfying this time to dream.
Maybe it is my diabetic sugar high I have been riding on for the last few days.... I am not a doctor nor do I play one on TV. :)
Seeing my prime-care person on Tuesday and maybe once I come off my sugar high, I will be back to normal and be able to not wish for the fairytale and go back to being fringe-like, so I don't need to step off and find that one person I have been wishing for.
Well, off to walk the dogs, hope my blood sugar comes down and I am 'normal' again...
From the fringe...peace
Susan
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